Monthly Archives: August 2008

sleep is for the weak

as you may or may not be able to see… its 3am and i am up typing this because once again I cant sleep.  Iam getting ready to ask the doc for some ambien or something.  I can sleep fine during the day but when it comes to going to bed at a normal time, it appears im having a little trouble.  dont get me wrong, Im tired. i just cant get to sleep i get bored just laying in bed, so i start watching tv. and before i know it, its 3 am.  this time i decided to get up and do something.  so i am researching about smartphones, exchange servers, and email.  believe it or not, i am losing out on so much overtime because i just cant be checking my email every second of every day.  so the people that can afford the blackberries and whatnot win out.  I have a kick ass phone. its a treo 680.  but i dont know if it is capable of the whole push email vs. exchange mail stuff or not.  that is what im trying to find out…. im pretty sure the centro is but as i said my phone already kicks ass. i dont want to have to get a new one, and i dont like the blackberries because they dont have a touch screen and the programs i use for work are not accessable for it either.  the newest palm the 800w looks like it has what i need but its only for sprint for the first year because of a bunch of contracts and stuff.  the centro in out finally for at&t but the keyboard is pretty small and i already fat finger mine as it is.  so i guess in the mean time i will be sitting in front of my computer. at 315 am  looking for overtime… because i apparently dont have anything better to do.

Gig’em right back at ya!

Now i cannot back this up. I am still try to research where it came from and its validity but here it is.
The following is an email that i have recieved about a supposed contest at TAMU.

Ya gotta love those Aggies!  They got this one right for sure!

The following is the 2007 winning entry from an annual contest at Texas A&M University calling for the most appropriate definition of a contemporary term. This year required a definition for the contemporary term, ‘Political Correctness’.

The winner wrote:

‘Political Correctness is a doctrine fostered by a delusional, illogical minority, and rabidly promoted by an unscrupulous mainstream media, which holds forth the proposition that it is entirely possible to pick up a turd by the clean end’.

The Clampets go to the hospital

OK I have finally met the dumbest person alive. We will call him Ted in an effort to protect the stupid. Around 2300 hrs tonight Ted was assaulted by some people that “live around the corner.” We arrive after the cops do and all he wants to know from us is if he can press charges. Ted insists that his eardrum is “broken.” So far this call is rather run of the mill but then it takes a turn for the worse.

“Ted, what is you phone number here?” I ask.

“I don’t know you’ll hafta ask my mom.” (Now keep in mind Ted is 20)

“OK, don’t worry about it.” I say.

Now at this point the officer wants it so Ted goes inside and comes out empty handed. He says he still doesn’t know. A minute goes by and a person opens the front door. It’s mom. She weighs at least 350 if not more, has a mustache that resembles Hulk Hogan’s. She asks him what happened to his bus card. The door opens again. A man who at first reminds me of the product of Jed Clampet and ZZ Top, minus the cool sunglasses come into view, this must be dad I think to myself. Dad says, and this is a direct quote, “Here is the home phone number. Now don’t lose it, it’s the only one we got.”

Mom then tells us that Ted is unable to read or write, which actually doesn’t surprise either of us. After all we had already come to the conclusion that mom and dad were blood relatives somewhere along the same stick of the family tree… but I digress… How the Hell do you get to be 20 years old and don’t know how to read?? My 2 y/o is able to read a few words like trash and sand.

The call runs smoothly for a while, Ted goes with the officers to show them where the people that beat him up live. While they are gone dad decides to chat us up. He tells us of how he uses his Medicare/Medicaid card as his bus pass, and how Ted was using a second copy of his dad’s card as his bus pass but he lost it. Dad is now worried that Ted wont make it back home because, “He don’t have a bus pass.” Well he never had one to begin with but that is neither here nor there. We also learn the story of the family vehicle which is in the shop because of the bilge pump or the pool pump which is what I swear I heard dad say. The officers arrive back at the ambulance Ted climbs in and then dad walks up and says I think I should go with him so he can get back home on the bus.” I begin to protest due to the ignorance just displayed but stop because maybe dad knows of some way to get 2 people home on just one Medicaid card.

On the way to the hospital the pt and my partner are sitting in the back, and I am listening to the conversation through the headset and it gets quiet for just a moment and I hear Ted say to my partner, “How you doin?” Luke, now baffled because this is not normal pt behavior says “I’m fine how are you?” Ted responds, “My head hurts” Luke’s only response is “Ya don’t say”

Due to laws that I totally agree with, Dad is sitting in the passenger seat. I hear Luke ask Ted what his zip code is and to help him out in case Ted doesn’t know I ask dad. “Sir, what zip code is it there at your house” the only response I get it a completely blank stare, “Sir?” again a stare. He is staring right out the windshield as if mesmerized by something off in the distance and it takes at least 2 min to get his attention.

We arrive at the Ambulance bay of my favorite hospital here in Austin and we all hop out of the truck. Ted is fine so he has earned the right to walk himself into the ER. We all walk the 30 ft to the door in Ted and I go and dad just stops dead in his tracks and again stares as if he has never seen this thing in front of him. It takes a good 90 Seconds to catch his attention and get him moving.

While I understand there are stupid people in the world- believe me, they are job security- it is hard to understand how these thoughts seem logical to people. I mean really; a piece of paper with the phone number on it is the only record of your phone number????? Don’t you maybe get a bill? Or maybe you can call someone with caller ID, or even better yet MEMORIZE IT.

This same night I am reminded of the Family Guy movie’s Wilford Brimley commercial. I included it for your benefit. Enjoy

A hunting we will go…

So my buddy Dave, has offered to take me dove hunting in October.  I cant tell you how excited I am.  First of all I havent been hunting since 2002. Second I have only been Hunting 3 times in my life, but I LOVE it. So its a long story as to how I got to go but none the less I am ready.  I have been looking at shotguns and as much as i like the prestige of names like Benelli or a Browning, i cant afford it.  What I can/may be able to afford soon is something like a Remington 870 or a Mossberg 500.  I have decided that I will be starting a collection plate for my shotgun.  It will be sitting on my bar, I will be placing any extra money I have in it, and we will see what magically appears in the coming weeks. I’m looking for between $175 and $250.

Disclaimer: I am not expecting any to place any money in said collection plate save for myself. However if you feel so compelled to “use” your own hard earned cash on something as asinine as buying me a shotgun then I shall feel so compelled to take it from you because I am opportunistic like that.

Now that that is out fo the way, I won an item on ebay for the first time in forever.  It cost me $0.99 +$11.00 shipping, but I would have paid more than that from any store I would have gotten them at. Ill take pics later once i recieve them. 

For my above mentioned hunting trip i am looking for a special piece of tactical gear and if any of you know where to find one cheap, please let me know.  I am looking for a MOLLE compatible thigh rig platform.  I know it sounds like a lot.  What is it you might ask?  You know how cops sometimes have their holsters or tasers on their thighs instead of their belt?   well that is call a leg drop holster.  I want a platform that I can put a leg drop holster onto… but not so that I can put a holster on it.  I plan on finding a pocket  and mounting it there for either shells or birds (dead ones of course).  So if anyone knows where to find one for under $60  (because thats what I have been finding) please let me know.

 

thats it from my world.  

peace

sleep is for the birds

ok so here it is 0530 hrs.  I’m not tired.  This hapens every once in a while.  The last few weeks I have been getting less and less sleep and it starts later and later every day.  I will have one late night for whatever reason, and bam it happens.  I know working nights doesn’t help but… what can you do.  I end up going to sleep later and later every night and eventually i end up like this. Its 530 am and while I am tired i know if i go to bed now I wont wake up in time for what i need to do tomorrow.  oh what is it you might ask. Well after I stop by CoA HR Employee Benefits office, I am driving to Huntsville.  Huntsville? you ask… My inlaws live there and My beautiful and always gorgeous bride, and my cute as a button daughter are there waiting for me.  While I would love to go to sleep and not wake up until like 4 in the afternoon (yes I have done it) I can’t.  I actually slept for 26 hours straight once.  I came back from summer camp on a Saturday got home around noon-ish,  finally went to take a nap after i was unpacked and mom was attacking the gigantic pile of ditry clothes fumigating the house, I think it was about 2 or so.  I didnt wake up until 4pm on Sunday.  As I remember, they were starting to get worried, and had checked on my numerous times (or so they say).  Gotta admit I was definitly refreshed when I woke up.  The funniest part, I went right to sleep later that night and slept until the morning.

So what I have now decided to do is clean the house. I already organized the garage a little.   threw out some crap that doesn’t need to be in there, like the empty boxes.  Moved MANY things around, and managed to perform a live action version of the scene from “The Simpsons” where Marge says everything cant fit into the car and suddenly the Tetris music starts and Homer stuffs everything in.

On another note all together… I think I am goign to play through Gears of War this week.  I hear its rather hard.  We will see.  I got the the regular difficulty of CoD4 in just a few hours.

Ok well I have managed to kill 18 minutes and probably wasted 25 of yours. but if you need help in wasting more time try starting here.