Monthly Archives: March 2008

Time is money so lets waste all of mine

Now I have heard pt’s say stupid things. But Sat night I heard one that takes the cake for this year. (remember its only March)  This pt had been arrested for disorderly conduct   and because he was acting strangely APD suspected he was on PCP (that is ALWAYS their diagnosis for someone acting strange) so we get to come out at almost 1 am to see what this guy’s major malfunction is.  My partner was conducting her usual pt interview, getting vital signs and I am sitting behind in the captain’s seat doing the paperwork.  I get to the blank about medical insurance.   Obviously we don’t require someone to have insurance to get treatment but we ask for it when we have an opportunity just to get that part out of the way.  I lean forward to the pt and say’ “Fred, (as usual name changed to protect the innocent until proven guilty) what do you use for your medical insurance?”  His reply: “Shit I don’t waste my money on shit like insurance.”  

Waste his money. That’s right now I get to waste my money on shit like his medical bills in the way of taxes.  Austin offers a MAP (Medical assistance program) it’s easy to get into but so many people just don’t.  It makes things cheaper for them. Granted I am still paying for it, in part. But those with MAP are charged less for the same services, and many of them actually make at least an attempt at payment.  Here is the kicker IT’S FREE but does he have it??? Hell no.

It would be nice if I could just not pay for medical bills? because if that was the case I wouldn’t be “Wasting my money on shit like insurance”

A Sad Day

Those of you that know me well know that for the last 2 years I have kept a Saltwater Aquarium.  Due to the size of the apartment we are moving into we made the decision to not move the tank to the new place.  We made this decision with a heavy heart.  So on Wed, someone (calling him A) contacted me about the ad for the items.  (I am keeping the tank and all the hardware) He and I slowly dismantled the aquascape rock by rock, until just my false percula clown fish named Lambchop was left.  A had agreed to take the fish with him even though he didn’t really have the room for her.  He was taking her home so he should take her too.  The initial plan was that he would offer her to someone in the club at no profit to him.  By 2pm on wed my tank was empty of everything but the water.  I checked the post I had placed on the ARC forum, and someone was asking about my clown that was in need of a loving home.  I am glad to announce, A placed Lambchop into his tank and she immediately took to the male clown already living there.

Actually the clown paired up with mine as soon as I put him in the tank. Thanks a lot Rob, they are a really cool pair. Your Clown is teaching mine how to go and be cleaned by the fire shrimp and they are having a lot of fun. I pair of clowns are a lot cooler than just one, very different behavior. I just need to get my new tank up and running because of the big bio-load I added.

So I am glad to hear that Lambchop is happy in her new home and that she even has a new Boyfriend. I will post some pictures of her and her BF once I get some. 

Office party on Friday everyone, bring your lawyer.

To those of you that read this, I owe you an apology. It’s been too long since I made an entry, but it isn’t for lack of trying. Wait who am I apologizing to? Nobody is reading this, the stats I see (that you can’t) prove that nobody is reading this. (4 hits in 5 days and I know 2 of those were me on a different computer.) I digress… Oh yeah, I just haven’t found much material to write about. Yeah things have happened but nothing notable. Nikki claimed all the good stuff about Skyler for her blog. Tonight it finally hit me. Sometimes material is just begging to be written about.

*****Disclaimer***** ADULT CONTENT and its LONG

A little back story… My old partner’s wife, we will call her C (her name has been changed to protect the innocent) is on some message groups for moms and stuff and they had a “Pure Romance party” not too long ago. My partner calls me last night and tells me about this party that C went to. So I started to look into them, Maybe I will talk to someone about throwing one for someone’s birthday that is coming up soon (hunny forget you read that part). Now I was thinking candles, feathers, blindfolds, maybe oils and lotions, and even lingerie and the novelty items. Boy was I wrong. These parties have a Host that comes to your house or where ever, and they bring stuff to make your sex life better and more romantic and you can order even more stuff form the catalogs too. They have all kinds of sex toys, vibrators of multiple different styles for multiple tasks, Love swings and slings, and things that go in places we just won’t mention here.

While researching these romance parties I ran across a similar yet completely different kind of party all together, this one is my favorite: Striptease classes. This place says they are able to cater the party to the abilities (and comfortabilities) of the group. This place offers a few different kinds of parties. They have what I guess is your basic “how to be a stripper” class. Then they offer the Chair party because “Everyday Women don’t have poles but everyone has a chair!” and then a themes & props party which seems pretty self explanatory and then another that combines them all into one.

I’m all for either of these (no I will not be participating in either). But here is the kicker and the point I am getting at. (FINALLY) Both of these web sites suggest reasons for these parties and what kinds of parties they are good for. They both made mention of something that, in this day and age just Blew my mind.

Direct from their website in a condensed format:

Girl’s Night Out
Mom’s Groups
Corporate Events

Bachelorette Bash
Suddenly Single
Spa Party
Office Party
Birthday Bash
Seasonal Themed parties

Really, REALLY???? An Office Party? While yes some places can get away with these kinds of things, Strip clubs, Adult stores, even the occasional escort service, but these occupations (while a vital part of society) don’t typically an office make.

A quote Directly from the Pure Romance site:

Office Party
Last year’s company outing to the bowling alley just took second place to this year’s Pure Romance party!

You have just received the new title of Pure Romance Office Party Coordinator and can expect to cash in on 10% of the party sales. For example, if your frisky little officemates purchase $500 in products, you will receive a $50 credit towards your order. You’ll no longer be wondering who stole your stapler, now you’ll be asking who took your Silver Bullet!

Picture this for the moment, you and 10 others from work (all women and maybe that gay guy that all the girls like to hang out with) sitting around talking about sex or doing a strip tease. How uncomfortable do you feel? Guys, you don’t count in this one. The only thing I thought about when I saw that was the lawsuit waiting to happen. “I was made to feel sexually inadequate when Jennifer over there could do the splits upside down on the pole and I couldn’t”, “Julie said some inappropriate things”, “I am mad that Alexandria bought the last purple rabbit when I made it very clear that I wanted one.”

Don’t get me wrong, while I am not a feminist, I am all about women learning to explore themselves, be it physically, emotionally, sexually, or spiritually. If they want to do it in these ways more power to ya. But an Office party????? That is a sexual harassment lawsuit waiting to happen. Can you imagine walking into the boardroom of a large corporation, and seeing dildos – sorry cake toppers, blindfolds, handcuffs, oils, and lingerie being laid out over the table? Or Imagine the talk around the water cooler the next day, “yeah Brenda bought this purple nightie it looks great on her and it’s totally see through.” The other thing… do you really want the people at work, the people you see every day, knowing what kind of vibrator you have, or that you bought the XL love swing, and paid extra for overnight delivery?????

People can sue for anything these days. “I’m suing the doctor and the hospital because I was born stupid. Furthermore they withheld that information from me. I had to hear it from the guy in the car behind me at the stop light.” While I support these parties 100%, I can’t help but wonder who in their right mind would hold one of these as an office party? Doesn’t everybody get the Sexual Harassment workshop every so often at work? As males, we can’t even give a genuine compliment to a woman without the risk of a lawsuit. Hell, its sexual harassment for a guy to even mention a strip club (I use the term 7-11) “Hey man are we all meeting at 7-11 after work? Good, I’ll see you there”

Again I support women I support their right to better themselves be it in the office or in the bed. But I believe those things should be left as they are, separate, unless, of course, you like getting your pants sued off.

If you can’t stand the needles, get out of the ambulance.

Thank you to S. Ward for emailing this out:

Fainting fireman sues to get job back

Thu Mar 6, 10:08 PM ET

A firefighter fired for fainting is suing the city of Saratoga Springs. Nathaniel King lost his job with the city fire department in December when he failed to complete newly required paramedic training, according to a lawsuit filed against the city in state Supreme Court in Saratoga County. Now he’s suing to get his job back and for back pay.

The problem is, needles are his nemesis. During paramedic training, King fainted dead away every time he had to give an injection or start an intravenous line.

In the lawsuit, King says he successfully completed emergency medical technician training before being hired, but the department later increased job requirements to include paramedic training. That meant he had to use needles.

Assistant Fire Chief John Betor said he couldn’t discuss the specifics of King’s case, but he was aware of the lawsuit.

In his court filing, King says Betor tried to help him with his needle aversion. He says he even tried hypnotism on Betor’s advice, but it didn’t help.

Public Safety Commissioner Ronald Kim said he can’t discuss pending litigation.

This is the story on Yahoo! news

No honey, you’re pregnant.


First off I would like to say this is NOT about my wife. Nikki is NOT pregnant.

 Now that we have that out of the way, I will continue.

Friday night we get a call for a Prirority 3 Abdominal Pain, 25y/o Female.  My partner and I arrive at the pt. We checked out the normal stuff: Vitals, 4 and 12-leads, etc to rule out a cardiac reason for her pain.  Now that we have decided her heart is not the problem we start looking at our differential diagnoses’.  Gall bladder, Aortic tear, Acid Reflux, etc.  after some investigation. the question is asked, “is there and chance you could be pregnant?”  “I guess I could be.” she says, “but I dont think so.”  My partner and I have, after extensive investigation, determined our pt is in fact pregnant and she doesn’t even know it.   How do you break that to someone? I have never had to. 

Her symptoms:

no period since October

Heartburn after greasy meals

Slight positional SOB

Nausea and vomiting in the AM

Lightheadedness when laying flat.

and them some others that I can’t remember.

So she says, “What do you think is the problem? Am I having a heart attack?”

 My partner then says “No honey, your pregnant.”

The amazing thing is 2 Males saw the signs/symptoms before she herself did. Now I know, “Maybe some one one the outside might have more insight”…..   no she has been pregnant multiple times How do you not learn. Keep your legs closed or use protection or even better BOTH, because some people are just to dumb to have children.

yes I am a Ghostbuster, and Emmitt Smith is my partner.

So we got approved for our apt, Whoop!! Apr 5 is move day. I have to say I feel like I haven’t packed anything. I packed up everything hanging on the walls and all the knick-knacks around the house save 1 or 2. Next is the upstairs TV stuff, then the bar and etc. I realize that I have a lot left to do but I have to figure out what we are going to need for the next month.

Anyone that wants to help is more than welcome… now don’t all raise your hands at the same time…

as for the rest of yesterday I got DAMN lucky.  only one call was outside, and it was during the nicer part. Yeah it was cold, but it wasn’t raining and we were really close to St David’s.  This was a funny call too.  We get there and realize it’s a bunch of BS.  The 2 officers were FTO’s so they had the cadets doing everything holding the guy up (he chugged what was left of his MAD DOG as they walked up…wouldn’t want to waste it) etc.  Well the pt kept saying to the one black officer “Hey it’s great to see you [while holding out his hand] I haven’t seen you in a long time.” The officer was polite but after the 3rd time the officer said to the pt, “Who do you think I am?”  The Pt replied “Emmitt Smith”

Unfortunately the rule here is if the pt cannot walk under his own power the jail nurse will not let them stay and have them sent to the hospital….  I know I know, that’s what drunk tanks are for right???  I tried and tried to get him to walk without assistance but to no avail. Every time we let go of him he began to fall.  I load him up in the truck sat him in the drunk seat. He proceeded to refuse to put his seatbelt on. Finally I told him we weren’t going anywhere until he buckled up.

He said “why do you care?”

Me: “It’s my job”

Him: “So what do you do for a living?”

Me: “look around what do you think I do for a living?”

Him: “Are you a Ghostbuster?”

I love school, no wait… yeah I do


I have a daughter, we all know this. I think she is the cutest thing on the planet, for those of you that may disagree, I may just have your legs broken… all it takes is one phone call. I digress… She does the funniest thing when I take her to daycare in the morning. She knows where she is going I ask “Do you want to go to school?” and she implies that she does. Once we get there she asks to get down once we get to the sidewalk. She runs to the outer door and tries to pull it open. She looks at me and says “Please”, so I open it for her. She runs to the inner door and reaches to push the buttons. Yes she does know the drill. I punch the code in and open the door for her. She runs to the door of her classroom and pulls the handle down. I pull on the door, Sky walks into the doorway and Stops……..up until the point she has been happy as a lark with smiles from ear to ear. The second the door opens the happy go lucky Skyler disappears. My happy little baby girl sits down looks at me and screams at the top of her lungs.

DISCLAIMER… I understand people’s views of daycare differ, but rest assured, within 10 minutes of me leaving, everytime, She is happy little Sky again. She enjoys daycare, to the point that she gets mad at us for coming to pick her up.